I'm not exactly the kind of guy, who wakes up early in the morning, in his bathrobe and comfortable fluffy slippers, making a super fancy coffee to drink while reading the newspaper.

I am however, a caffeine addict who's starting to wake up more early in the morning, because he's inevitably turning into a grumpy, bitter old man.

But when I am making me a morning coffee, I do like to have some easily digestable, pleasant or funny little things to read, while my groggy @ss is waking up in the morning.

And I do believe that the Newgrounds blog/news -posts can be PERFECT for that. And some people around here can type up a nice entertaining little thing to read. But they usually just get burried by tiny little shitposts, memes, or project announcements or status updates. Wich are all fine and dandy, and should also be freely used for these things. But I would love to see more fun or quirky little slice of life stories, maybe accompanied by some funny doodles here and there.

Kind of like Hyperbole and a half (if you do a quick google search, and find that blogspot website,have a little look, may be a funny timewaster to read).

Yeah, that's pretty much what I wanted to say. So if anybody who might read this, knows a Newgrounds user, who writes up some pretty entertaining news-posts. Please drop me a name of the user in the comments. And in return, I will say a heartfelt 'thank you very much' or simple 'thanks' with a smiling emoji as an added little bonus.

Okayloveyoubaaaai! o/

-Plates

-Knives

-Forks

-Spoons

-Glasses (for drinking, not for seeing)

-Food

-Drink

(-candles?)

Is that enough? Or did I forget some essential stuff?

Fellas, listen closely:

If you're looking for that little bit of warmth, during those cold & lonely winter days. Invest in a blanket, hang out by a radiator, or go sit by a fire.

Trust me bro.

Works every time.

Here I am thinking: 'yess! The USA finaly has a president who hates women as much as I do!' And then he goes pulling this crazy stunt, making the competition in women's sports fair again.

Hugs & Kisses from Kazachstan. <3

My apologies in advance, to all you vibe-hunters out there, who may stumble across this sh*t-poast; Looking for a good time, funny things or memes or whatever. But the shoulder market is sadly in complete shambles in this economy, so I'm having a hard time aquiring one for myself to have a good old fashioned cry on. I'm also currently not able to just slide into my Lamborginni and drive away, to dump a big ol' bucket of cash over a professional, to have some of that therapy 'n shit either, as I don't actually own a Lamborginni, or a BMW for that matter. Butt whatever, here goes.

Been feeling really demotivated lately. I haven't felt such a massive lack of motivation in a really long time. Also, I've been smoking (from one pack in 3 days, to a pack a day) and drinking way too much coffee this week, kinda like some ghoulish, tired, nightshift worker, but during normal day hours. Feeling like it's hopelessly impossible, to be able to enjoy the good, simple things, that some people like to say are completely free in life. Just basic social stuff, like meeting up with people I like, talking, going out somewhere, visiting somebody or having some folks come over to visit me. It's all starting to feel like it's either becoming impossible, unafordable, or I have to spent spend so much time, money and effort, just to be able to do a few of these things, so I would inevitably end up exhausted and too burnt out to enjoy any of it.

It was like the simplest thing ever, when I was a little kid back in school. We (me and my classmates, or friends from other classes) were all stuck in boring school together, so we tried to have fun, to make the best of things and I looked forward to hanging out together, just gooffing off after school. It got a little bit harder when moving over to highschool, but I still enjoyed a rather pleasant social life. In my short two years of college, things got harder. People I used to hang out with moved away, spread out all over the country. And most people I was with at the time, all had lots of college work to do, or lived too far away, had a job on the side or other obligations more important that hanging out.

And for the many years after that, up to present time, the difficulty levels of having any sort of social life, slowly started creeping up to the highest settings. I think it's even been more than seven years, since I've been able to convince some co-workers, to have a beer together, after a long-ass work day in the summer, working in a big old warehouse, stacking and packing up boxes and pallets, moving that shit around all day. To some, it's probably the most standard thing in the world, but holy fuck dude, I miss that shit so badly. Nowadays, people just seem to wanna fuck straight off after being done with work for the day. No longer want to see the faces associated with their stupid jobs, or just having too much important stuff going on. And living in a big city alone, where I don't really know anybody, and everything seeming to be incredibly expensive, doesn't make things any easier either.

Creatively, I also can't really say I've been able to find my way back into 'The Zone' again for an even longer amount of time. Last time I really got into it, really gettin'down and enjoying making some animations and stuff,was all the way back in 2014: working on the Gametal Trailer video posted on my Newgrounds page, almost a year after that. 

Even back then, my life was already a shitty mess; I freshly dropped out of college after two years, not getting that piece of paper, leaving myself with student debts I'm still slowly paying off to this day,my mother had to go and die of lungcancer (that certainly won't help the mood either amirite?). I had to leave my parental home, because it was just me and my step dad there (who was a great dude, no troubles from him, he made my mom happy during her last years, so kudos for that old man!), both of us sitting around the house like some misserable, passive, broken spirited sobbing monkeys. So he'd rather moved out, to move in with the new lady in his life. I couldn't maintain the house, paying for all the maintanence, utilities and mortage and all that shit. So he sold the house at a loss to pay off the mortage he took over. We went our sepperate ways and I moved in with a friend and his family for a year, while I sluggishly tried to work and save up some money so I could eventually move out on my own. After wich I moved into a big city by myself, because my old town didn't realy have enough work availlable, wich wasn't seasonal or had enough workhours, to pay for rent and food and shit to live stable and independantly.

Living with him certainly didn't help our friendship (oh quite the contrary indeed), because there was plenty of trouble and drama inside the household, between him and his family. So whenever I wasn't working, I wanted to be out of the house as much as I could. So I would head out with my humble little laptop, sitting down at my local library, or some cafe or coffeeshop, and just worked on my little sprite animation for this dude, who's making metal covers of videogame songs, who I was a big fan of at the time. So that was pretty much my latest moment of really enjoying animating, because it was a very (VERY) welcome escape for me back then.

Way before that, when I still enjoyed animating, was when little teenage me finaly had a bedroom of my own, with a crackling old second-hand Pentium 3 computer, having fun playing around with Flash animations after school.

After that highschool period, I rushed into college (Big mistake kids! Take some time to figure out if you really wan't to go, and pick a good uni/college as well!), wanting to do something with animation, but the college I chose, only really offered animation as a kind of afterthought. I also didn't have much faith, that a diploma would actually really help me getting paid work down the line, and having a mother back home, in the procces of dying didn't help my focus and determination either. (besides that, to be honest, I did not actually have much artistic talent to begin with, nor did I have that mighty big flame of ambition burning inside of me, to make really great art by working hard and dilligently. I was just pretty good at the part of placing little pictures around the screen, to move them around in a way, that's kinda pleasing to the eye. That's pretty much it now that I think of it really)

So fast-forwarding to current time again, where this 30+year old college dropout is slowly working his dead-end job to stay afloat, wich is going kinda okay I guess, so don't worry about that (if you actually do, lol). I'll just keep on truckin'. Will see if some actually worth-while social/work/living/othercoolshit(/dating???) opportunities may arrise. And I suppose I'll just go on and try and make the best of it, with the things I got.

Alright fellas (and fellasses I guess?)! That was that. Thank you for listening to my TED bitching, moaning and complaining session. And have a good one!

See ya! ';3

Kids today, will probably never understand that certain sense of wonder, wich was the early days of the internet.

But oh boi, let me tell ya. When you think of Google now, you may think of all kinds of different sorts of buttloads of random tech/internet/smartphone/advertisement/espionage/privacy/email/youtube related things. But how I used to think of it back when I was a nineties/naughties (very naughty indeed) kid, and maybe still think of it today, as just a search engine. And strangely enough, just that search engine alone, was so much more...fun. More interresting. More intruiging. More magical even, than pretty much all things Google nowadays combined.

I certainly won't say that it was more practical in every way imaginable. Because Google does have some loads of very practical internet things, like having Google maps on the phone. Quite handy when you're somewhere you haven't been before.

But way back then. In that strange time of me ol childhood. Just that search engine alone was one incredible source of entertainment and various assortments of interresting random bullshizzle and whatnot. Like, imagine this if you can:

You're a little kid in elementry school. And it's recently has become a normal thing, to have this rectangular, gray crackling machine (or more of them next to eachother! ':D) with a little gray TV-box-screen thing. And some boards with buttons and stuff, with this thing that had only two buttons that has a weird ball attached to the bottom. This strange bundle of machines hooked up to eachother was called a computer. It had a connection to the internet, just like our phones do today! But the awesome difference was. If you used Google, to search for some word or phrase, anything in particular or random couple of words. Then you could find all sorts of random things and information about it! Holy shiz man, there were some fun things and interresting stuffs to be found with that old Google back in the day.

Now we may have it better though, by instantly getting to see stuff you could buy, that is vaguely related to what you wanted to search for, followed up by some popular social media pages, also completely different, but technically, still vaguely related to the words you were looking for.

Yup. Times back then with ol' Google.

Okay this old millenialboomer should maybe touch a little less grass.

Well here's a fun fact for ya.

Over here in Nederland (aka: The Kingdom Of The Netherlands), it is cheaper to go to a coffeeshop (for some reason, that's what we call the weed-stores over here) and get yourself a big ol' doobee to get stoned off yer balls, than it is to get a small latté at Starbucks.

Only €3.50 (three fiddie!!) to get a joint.

And at least €4.60 for their smallest cup of coffee with a lil milk in there.

Now I aint promoting either of these. So get yer fat (or skinny, I don't care) ass outside and work out to get that runners high. And go slurp down some water, you bunch of animals.

Okayloveyoubye.

...a big 'ol bushy beard on my face! Because, unlike women, it provides me with a little bit of warmth during the oncoming cold winter days.

Thanks for reading and don't forget to like, subscribe and leave a comment, for more amazing content like this.

I would design 1 pair of pants. One that is stylish, but functional. Pants that will never turn your crown jewels into a sweaty swamp situation during the summer. But doesn't let your popsicle freeze off in the winter either. Have deez fancy pantz massproduced, then sold in as many stores that will sell em, for a reasonable price. But just expensive enough so I can enjoy a having a (1st and) second home, and like; one funny, excessively extravagant, vehicle. Haven't decided on what kind of vehicle yet, will think about that when the time comes. But that oughta be enough, I will make due without the diamond studed hot-tubs, filled with the funny white powders and ladies who touch me where it smells funny for money.

And then retire from the fashion industry, because that bussiness a little bit too souper douper gayyyyyyyyyyy for my tastes.

Okayloveyoubye.

This poast is a big dumb ellaborate question, on how to expand upon the expression: 'sugar-coating the news'. And to see if any random person reading this can come up with something funny or clever to say.

How can you tell people what happened? You could tell somebody, the way it is, sure. But that is bland. You could also sugar-coat the news, but that's been done to death already, not original anymore.

How else can you present the news? Could you sauce it up too? A pinch of salt or seasoning? Some herbs (know wut I'm sayin'?) and spices maybe (bby(q))?

So many condiments, so many methods of cooking it up. Let me hear one of your recipes of bringing some news to somebody. And let's say the bad news you have to tell, is to your child; 'little Timmy', his (gold-)fish just died.

How would you tell him? In a way that is not as it is, so not to the point. And also not sugar-coating it.

Please do tell me an example, of how to bring that reccipe, in that bad news situation.